Reading 1st Kings 3:3-14, there is at least one fact that is easy to overlook. Solomon does “not pray for wisdom” in a vacuum. Solomon prays for a discerning heart because he is in a certain situation. In verse 9 Solomon says: “Therefore give to your servant an understanding heart to judge your people, that I may discern between good and evil” (NKJV). To repeat an oft-worn question— what’s the therefore there for?
Solomon understands the position he is in. His literal position is a son sitting on a throne. His figurative position is the leadership of a nation, entrusted with making decisions. He feels like a little child. Therefore, he desires to discern between good and evil.
Solomon’s story then progresses in a way which feels inevitable depending on how familiar you are with those pages, which in turn is dependent on how much you remember from being taught, which is in turn dependent on what was important to your teacher at the time. This fact, that Solomon is not praying for wisdom in a vacuum, can change the way you approach praying for wisdom.
If I focus on “praying for wisdom” without understanding my own situation, then it would be so easy for me to keep the prayer vague and even fool myself with that vague prayer. I can say: “God please give me wisdom,” but if I don’t know what situations I am navigating, how am I to know if I exercised wisdom? In other words, if I fail to discern my position, however would I know if I am discerning good and evil?
Imagine this: I pray from the position of a little child, in a community of children. Do I pray vaguely for wisdom, or do I spend time and energy to discern the specific situations I am in currently and in the future?
Do I pray for wisdom each time I walk in the doors of the meeting house; wisdom to speak encouragingly with brothers and sisters, wisdom to rejoice in the time given to each of us to increase our shared faith, wisdom to be mindful how much power words have, wisdom to discern that a lack of encouragement looks very similar to discouragement? I would never discourage someone! But if I fail to encourage…what’s the difference?
Do I then pray for wisdom to take that some love and encouragement away from the meeting house? At work I will be in a certain position. Do I pray for wisdom to be patient with coworkers who may have struggles I know nothing of? For wisdom to be patient with myself when I make mistakes, as the way I handle that has a powerful impact on others? For wisdom to replace stressed fretting with action? Wisdom to be mindful of the difference between choosing to and struggling with?
And then outside of work as well; wisdom to know when toxic behaviors (my own or others) are negatively influencing relationships? Do I discern which books, movies, memories, sermons, classes, events, and interactions have put fingerprints on the lens through which I view the world? Do I just pray for wisdom in a general way, or do I use the little wisdom which God has already provided to understand my current situation, and pray accordingly, seeking deeper divine wisdom from above?
Solomon used a little wisdom in his prayer to discern his certain place and time, and he asked for a certain wisdom to navigate the path which was directly before him. I cannot pray for wisdom in a vacuum because I do not exist in a vacuum. I need wisdom with my family, with my friends, with strangers, and I need wisdom with myself.
If you read this, then pray for me to be more precise. Pray for me to avoid vague requests, for vague prayers will let me feel good in a vague way. If I pray for wisdom to “be more loving” then I can just tell myself of course I am loving! But if I pray for “wisdom to love specifically by giving benefit of the doubt to someone I feel is wrong and acting foolishly. And if that wrong person is me, Lord, give me courage to change and believe in your grace instead of beating myself up or ignoring the truth.”
Then I will know myself by my own words and actions or lack thereof. So, if you are reading this, pray for me. Pray for me to discern good and evil. Pray for me to examine myself so that I can know myself by my love or by my hate. Pray for me to remember where wisdom comes from. Pray for me to not be too harsh on myself as I realize how vague my prayers can be. Remind me that the Spirit intercedes for us when we do not how to pray. Remind me that God hears and has prepared good beyond what the ear can hear. Pray for me, pray for you, pray for us.
We are a certain people, in a certain time, at a certain place. Therefore, pray boldly for the certain wisdom which we need to discern good and evil. Certain prayers and speech are pleasing to God.